


Writing Assignments and Adventures

by josephina_x



Series: Cotton Candy Bingo 2012 [11]
Category: Smallville
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-03
Updated: 2016-07-03
Packaged: 2018-07-19 19:49:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 5,288
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7375105
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/josephina_x/pseuds/josephina_x
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Prompt: Holding hands publically (random time during season 3, close-ish to the end of the season, takes place before “Lex And His Plans”, which is before "A Fractured Fairy Tale")</p><p>Written for the <a>Clexmas True Love Fest 2015</a> (seven days of prompts).</p><p>These were comment fics written for the 'fest, with no word limits (hi or lo). The prompts for the ‘Fest are listed in the chapter titles.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Day 1 -- Old Fashioned Courtship

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Original thread-posting on Clexmas is here: [link](http://clexmas.livejournal.com/104479.html?thread=1151519#t1151519).

"A bouquet of wild flowers," said Clark.

"A dozen red roses," Lex corrected mildly.

"A dozen?"

Lex nodded. "With one extra to hand to her in-person."

Clark frowned. "What? --Wait, what happens to the other dozen?"

"She finds them first, on a table, in a vase, when she walks in the front door of her house after work. No card."

The pencil stilled in Clark's hand. "Um, isn't that a bit creepy?"

Lex turned to him and raised his eyebrows. "Creepy?"

"Well, how'd the flowers get in the house when she wasn't there? Somebody'd have to break in to put them there, right?"

Lex blinked at him.

"Clark, it's fiction," Lex told him. "Nobody thinks about those things in fiction. They just read the reaction of the character as their own," he told Clark authoritatively. "A reader would see the scene with the flowers being left there first, before the reveal to the other character, and because of that they won't think it's creepy; as the reader they'd know exactly what was happening." He paused, then turned back to his book. "Though, if you wanted more of a mystery-romance, you could reverse the order of the scenes for more suspense, instead."

"My teacher said that this assignment is supposed to be realistic," Clark reminded Lex with much censure. "And I'm pretty sure that if I found a vase of flowers someplace that was locked and I was the only one with a key to, that I didn't put there, I wouldn't be thinking 'romance'. I'd be thinking 'stalker'."

"Clark--"

"And they'd have to be stalking me if they knew my schedule to be able to break into my place without getting caught!"

Lex frowned slightly. "Clark, people don't generally put themselves in a character's shoes, within their limited viewpoint in the story, and think about how they'd react without knowing everything being presented to the reader, instead. And it's fine if you write the character differently than yourself. If you just write the character as enjoying the flowers, and not thinking about where they came from..."

"But that's not realistic!" Clark blurted out, frustrated.

Lex gave him a long look. "What your reaction would be to a mysteriously-appearing vase of flowers doesn't matter, Clark. You aren't a girl; it's different for them." Lex said.

Clark crossed his arms, stubbornly.

So Lex took in a breath and asked, "Remind me, Clark -- how did Lana react to those butterflies that that 'bug boy' left for her in her bedroom?"

Clark got a sour look.

"Fine," Clark muttered, dropping his head down and getting back to his writing assignment.


	2. Day 2 -- Blind Date

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Original thread-posting on Clexmas is here: [link](http://clexmas.livejournal.com/104878.html?thread=1151918#t1151918).

“This is the stupidest thing in the history of ever,” Clark muttered.

Lex smirked at him. “Well, perhaps if you’d paid more attention to the assignment…”

“She didn’t say we’d have to stick to the category of the original prompt!” Clark objected. “I didn’t think I’d have to write romance-y things for the _entire_ short story unit!”

“And yet, here you are…” Lex bit down on a grin at the look Clark shot him.

“I wasn’t trying to start out romance-y,” Clark muttered. “The prompt was old-fashioned courtship. I just couldn’t think of anything else for the others, and flowers aren’t that romantic.”

“Mm-hm,” said Lex, turning the page of his Warrior Angel comic.

“And she said we were supposed to write from experience!”

Lex turned to Clark and gave him an incredulous look.

Clark caught his look. “I gave flowers to Lana before!” he said defensively. “And that was sort of a courtship thing!”

“And I told you how you did it wrong that time, too,” Lex reminded him lightly, because, honestly, Clark should’ve asked him first. He glanced over at Clark as he flipped the next page. “What’s the topic for this one?”

Clark grumbled as he put pencil to paper. “A blind date.”

Lex fought to keep down a snicker. It was harder than it should have been.

“It’s not funny,” Clark said without looking up.

“Didn’t you use to read the same romance novels as Lana did?” Lex asked, feeling more and more amused with each passing moment. He closed the comic book in his lap.

Clark muttered vile imprecations under his breath. For him.

“You could just write something completely different this time,” Lex pointed out. “You don’t have to try and continue it from the last one you wrote.”

“That’s a horrible idea,” Clark told him. “I had a hard enough time coming up with something for the first one,” Clark said. “Why can’t we just pick our own prompts?” he bemoaned, as though the world was not fair, and justice had better prevail really, really soon.

“I suspect the guidelines are supposed to help,” Lex made mention, which sent Clark muttering all over again. “Have you figured out how you’re going to get them to meet without someone being creeped out?”

“Not really,” said Clark. “Having the second vase of flowers show up at work wasn’t as creepy as having them show up at work first, and _then_ at home, I guess, because it was an easier place to get into the second time, like he was backing off a bit.”

“...Yes,” Lex prompted.

“But it probably only seemed that way because the idea of leaving them in her car instead would be even more super-creepy than that,” Clark added.

“Mm-hm,” said Lex.

“Since people give out house keys to neighbors sometimes and houses are easier to get into than cars when they’re not convertibles,” Clark pointed out, scribbling away on a page. “And lots of people know where other people work.”

“True,” Lex agreed.

“But you said no notes with the flowers,” Clark grimaced. “And I had a random delivery guy do the single-rose thing for him as a proxy, like the whole old-fashioned English ‘need to be chaperoned’ thing.”

“Yes, you did,” Lex said patiently, letting Clark work it out out loud.

“So how am I gonna get her to say ‘yes’ to a blind date?” Clark muttered, scratching his head and staring down at the page. “The guy’s not being straight with her; he could be anybody with enough money to pay for this stuff.” Clark paused. “Or somebody from the office who doesn’t like her and wants to mess with her,” he added, and Lex sighed as the high school drama popularity-contest ‘make fun of the geek’ idiocy -- of completely viable paranoia in his experience, mind you -- reared its ugly head and entered the scene.

Lex couldn’t think of much else to say, beyond, “Well, I’m sure you’ll think of something,” as he set aside his comic book and got up from the couch. He decided that he’d better ask Cook to make chocolate chip cookies for their snack this afternoon, the really big ones. It sounded like Clark was going to need the pick-me-up.

He left Clark to his writing.


	3. Day 3 -- Astrological (zodiac, chinese new year animals, etc)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (AN [posted with original thread]: Has anybody guessed where I’m going with this one, yet? *g*)
> 
> Original thread-posting on Clexmas is here: [link](http://clexmas.livejournal.com/105055.html?thread=1152095#t1152095).

“No,” said Clark.

“Clark--”

“Just no.”

“Clark--”

“I said NO!” Clark repeated. “No means no!”

Lex sighed.

“Asking somebody what their sign is is just corny,” Clark told him, almost sounding offended at even the very thought of such a thing. “It’s a **horrible** pick-up line.”

“It’s a conversation starter,” Lex said.

“No, it’s a conversation _ender_ ,” Clark said adamantly, crossing his arms.

“Clark--”

“It’s a horrible pick-up line out of a 60’s swinger movie, or something!” Clark said, throwing up his arms in outright disgust.

“And it’s realistic and old-fashioned and some people actually take those sorts of things seriously,” Lex told him.

“ _They_ don’t,” Clark muttered, speaking for his ongoing-short-story characters.

Lex contemplated telling Clark that, despite his perfectly-rational and logical small-town belief, astrology _could_ , in fact, be serious business for some of Metropolis’ citizens... and denizens. Instead, Lex opted to frown slightly and tilt his head to look at Clark better.

“...Why do you have such a problem with this, really?” Lex asked him.

“He-- _She_ deserves better than that,” Clark muttered, looking away and recrossing his arms.

Lex looked at him askance.

“I think I may have to go with Clark on this one,” Martha said, as she walked in and over to Clark to give him a quick peck on the head. “It’s a bit… outdated. His classmates won’t get it.”

“And it’s _my_ story,” Clark said, all but glaring at Lex.

“I’m sorry that our argument got so loud,” Lex put out there to her, circumventing the original question entirely. No fool, he.

“What’s wrong with a little astrological comparison?” Lionel asked, walking into the library after her.

Martha turned and gave him an odd look.

“It’s nothing but some harmless fun, isn’t it?” Lionel said with a chuckle.

Clark and Martha exchanged a look.

Lionel looked over at Martha good-naturedly enough, as though he had no idea what the problem might be.

Lex dropped his head back on the couch and tried not to groan. Apparently, this was a Luthor thing.


	4. Day 4 -- Uncertainty

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (AN [posted with original thread]: If you don't know what 'verse this lives in after this, ask and ye shall receive! ;)
> 
> Original thread-posting on Clexmas is here: [link](http://clexmas.livejournal.com/105391.html?thread=1152431#t1152431).

Lex walked into the office with something a little like trepidation.

“Principal Reynolds,” he greeted his former headmaster, Clark’s current high school principal, with no small reserve. The last time he’d been in here, he’d done so in order to try and get the man to back off of Clark a bit, thinking that he’d been ‘picking’ on Clark due to his association with Lex. He’d all but outright bribed the man with a donation of computers for the school, for just for such an effect. He’d subsequently been told by his ex-headmaster in not so many words that he’d grown up to be just like his father.

It hadn’t been a compliment.

This time, he wasn’t here on his own initiative, though; Principal Reynolds had asked to see him. Specifically.

“Lex,” the principal said, and the way he said his name nearly had Lex stumbling over his own feet as he moved forward to sit down in a chair. Reynolds always made it a point to call his students by their first names, but...

Well. He had the strongest urge to blurt out ‘Did I do something wrong?’

Clearly he had been hanging around with Clark too much. _Clearly._

He removed his hand from the back of the chair and came to a halt where he was in front of the man’s desk.

“Would you like to sit down?” the principal asked.

“...I’ll stand, thanks,” Lex told him dryly, having changed his mind on the subject. It was on the tip of his tongue to ask just why he’d been called down to the principal’s office, when he’d never even gone to school here, but…

“I’m sure you’re wondering why I called you down here,” the man told him.

“Yes.” Understatement of the century, really.

Principal Reynolds looked at him, then crossed his hands on his desk. “It’s about Clark.”

Lex didn’t even blink. He’d actually expected this to happen at some point.

So he stuck his hands in his pockets and rattled off, with no small dearth of practice, “I’m not stopping being friends with him, I’m certainly not stopping being _brothers_ with him, and, frankly, if you tell me to stop spending time with him, I’ll cheerfully tell you to go to hell. Sir.”

The principal didn’t blink. He _did_ seem almost amused from the way he was smiling.

“Good,” said Principal Reynolds.

“Good?”

“You don’t think so?”

Lex frowned at the man. He still had the feeling he was in trouble somehow.

“What about Clark?” Lex tried. Then it occurred to him to ask, “Shouldn’t you be having this conversation with his mother?”

“I already had a conversation with her about this,” the principal said.

“She talked to you and then asked you to call me down here?” Lex asked, confused.

“No, after explaining things to her, I was the one who suggested it.”

...Well, that made things about as clear as mud.

“What, exactly, is the problem here?” Lex asked.

“It’s about Clark’s schoolwork,” he was told, which didn’t exactly make things any clearer. “Specifically, his latest set of assignments in English class.”

It was a good thing Lex was already standing up -- he’d’ve spent precious seconds shooting to his feet, instead of barreling straight ahead with: “Clark hasn’t been cheating in class!”

“Lex--”

Lex cut him off immediately. “Clark doesn’t cheat, and I certainly didn’t do his work for him. He got stuck on the prompts, and I acted as a sounding board for him, yes, but he wrote every last word of those assignments himself!” Lex declared, agitated in the extreme.

“Yes, Lex, I know.”

Lex opened his mouth to protest further, then the principal’s words caught up with him. “--What?” he asked instead. _...Wait, then what’s the problem?_

Principal Reynolds sighed and sat back in his chair as Lex looked on, puzzled.

“I take it you haven’t actually read what he wrote for the assignments in question,” the principal asked of him, as he opened up a file drawer in the side of his desk.

“Well, no,” Lex said. He hadn’t thought he’d needed to.

He watched as the principal sifted through a few file folders, and then pulled out a sheaf of papers. They were held out to him.

“Maybe you should,” he was told.

Lex moved around the chair and approached the desk.

“You might want to sit down,” he was told as he took the papers from his ex-headmaster’s hand, and he puzzled over why the man would caution him to do that.

That was before he looked down at the page. And the first thing that stood out at him was...

“What in the world,” Lex blurted out under his breath.

He sat down in the chair.

He started scanning through the contents.

He looked up at his principal with something like dismay.

“You can’t be serious,” he said to the man.

He got a pair of raised eyebrows for his trouble.

“This may be Kansas, but this isn’t the Dark Ages,” Lex gritted out, tossing Clark’s short story submissions onto the desk surface between them. He didn’t know why Clark had changed the genders of the characters in the stories to both be male, instead of male and female, but… “If Clark’s English teacher has a problem with him writing about homosexual relationships that aren’t anything close to containing explicit material, then--”

“Lex.”

Lex stopped talking.

Ex-headmaster Reynolds sighed at him again, and Lex had the same old feeling he’d gotten one too many times after he’d been dragged into the office to talk with the man, back at Excelsior Prep: he felt completely and utterly stupid. As though he’d somehow missed the point entirely.

“Lex,” Clark’s principal began, ”Do you know what the parameters of the assignment were?”

Lex frowned at him. “Yes, of course,” he told him. “Clark was supposed to pick a prompt and write a short story on it, one per assignment. The prompts for later assignments had to remain in the same category as the prompt from the original assignment, and he was supposed to write things realistically and, if possible, from his own experience…” Then it hit him.

Lex leaned forward and his eyes bored into Terrence Reynolds

“Who has been making unwanted passes at Clark,” Lex demanded, hands sinking into the sides of the armrests like claws. _Who do I have to kill._

...The man was smiling at him again.

“No-one, as far as I’m aware,” he was told, though as Lex slowly relaxed he realized that the man was and had been watching him like a hawk, for some reason.

He took in a deep breath and let it out again.

“Then you have me at a loss,” Lex admitted none-too-happily, because he thoroughly hated surprises, and this was shaping up to be one of those. “If his teacher hasn’t filed a complaint about the subject matter, and no-one is picking on or otherwise bullying Clark, then what is the issue here?”

“Lex,” he was asked, “Does this situation not remind you of anything?”

And then Principal Reynolds sat back and... waited.

Lex frowned.

“...Is Lionel trying to get you fired again?” was really the best he could come up with.

His ex-headmaster gave him a somewhat-pained look and rubbed a hand across his face. He looked almost… tired.

“Lex,” he began again. “Do you remember, back at Excelsior, when we had that talk about boys?”

Lex blinked at him blankly.

“...Well, yes,” he said. “But what does that have to do with anything?”

“He wrote it from his own experience, Lex,” his ex-headmaster told him.

“Yes?” Was it a problem, so long as no-one was making unwanted passes at his little brother, or otherwise making fun of him for what he had written about?

Principal Reynolds gave him a ‘come on’ look. “Lex, heterosexual teenaged boys do _not_ put that much thought into how a homosexual relationship actually functions.”

_Oh._ Lex blinked at him.

“I…” Lex shook his head. “Wait. That doesn’t make any sense. Clark isn’t gay…”

But then he had to pause because, well, younger alien brother, much? What was ‘normal’ for Clark, exactly? Was ‘heterosexual’ even a thing for Kryptonians? For all Lex knew, they lay eggs.

Not that not-knowing was all his fault. Lex wasn’t exactly the one spending a lot of time with the Veritas folks, but that was only because they didn’t seem to want him around, poking his nose into things. Lionel certainly was keeping him frozen out of the whole thing as much as possible, and Clark didn’t seem to need or want to talk about any of it, much.

“No,” the principal agreed, “It’s far more likely he’s bisexual. But I’ve brought the subject to the attention of Martha, and she seemed to take it fairly well,” Principal Reynolds told him, shifting forward in his chair, to clasp his hands on his desk. “She’ll be having a talk with him later today, if she hasn’t already.”

“And you’re telling me because…” Lex didn’t like where this was going. He liked it even less when he realized… “Oh god, you _didn’t_.”

“You aren't still embarrassed about it,” his former headmaster pointed out, with an undertone of _you can't possibly be_. “I don’t see why it would be anything but helpful for her to know.”

“My sexual orientation is none of her business!” Lex spat out angrily.

Now the principal looked vaguely worried. “Lex, your father _does_ know already…”

“Yes!” No thanks to the man sitting in front of him. “And it went very, very poorly!”

“Lex, you were hardly disowned.”

Lex ran a hand over his head and looked away. It still hadn’t gone well. There had been a _lot_ of yelling. And denial. On both sides.

“I don’t have sexual relationships with men,” he told his former headmaster. “I never have. Everyone knows that.” It would have been plastered all over the papers if he ever had, as a start.

“I still think it would benefit Clark to know that you are not strictly heterosexual, Lex,” the principal told him, with nothing more than good intentions for all parties involved in this, his family’s very private matter.

Lex sighed.


	5. Day 5 -- Hope

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Original thread-posting on Clexmas is here: [link](http://clexmas.livejournal.com/105473.html?thread=1153281#t1153281).

“...Clark?” Lex asked, knocking on the door to Clark’s room in the mansion. He wasn’t sure whether now was a good time to intrude. He’d just made it back from the high school, and his meeting with Principal Reynolds about Clark’s… well, Clark’s _possible_ not-all-that-heterosexual orientation.

He really, _really_ did **not** want to walk in on the middle of whatever conversation Martha might be having with her son on the matter. Really, oh-so- _very_ , not.

It didn’t exactly help that apparently his former headmaster had told her that Lex was bisexual himself. He could have gone on and managed perfectly well throughout the rest of his life, such as it was, without anyone else knowing about that one. His father, the headmaster, and Lex himself was something like three too many already, in Lex’s vaunted opinion on the matter.

Not that he was ashamed of it. He was just… very selective in who he thought ought to know this information about him. --For one thing, the press would have a field day with it.

“Clark?” Lex asked again, leaning against the doorway. He hadn’t been in the library, or the kitchen, and he never stayed at the Talon this late, so it was something of a sure thing that he had to be in his room right then. “Are you all right?”

“‘m fine,” came the half-mumbled response.

Lex breathed out, then in. “Can I come in?”

There was a neutral grunt that could have been a ‘yes’.

Lex let himself in.

Clark was face-down on his bed, with a pillow over his head.

“That bad, huh?” Lex said, walking over and sitting down on the edge of the bed.

Clark slowly pulled the pillow off of his head and looked up at him.

“Oh god, they told you,” were the first words out of Clark’s mouth, and he rolled away from him.

Lex grimaced slightly. “I take it they didn’t tell _you_.”

“What?” Clark sat up and turned back towards him, clutching the pillow to his chest.

Lex decided to start from the beginning. “Are you bisexual?”

Clark grimaced and looked away. He shrugged.

“All right,” said Lex. He took in another breath in and out. “Well, I know I am.”

Clark’s head came up and he got stared at.

“Uh, surprise?” Lex said, spreading his hands out, palms up.

“...There are people who don’t know that?” was Clark’s next question to him.

Lex blinked at him.

_Wait, what?_ “I never told you that!” Lex said, in no small shock.

“It’s not obvious?” Clark frowned at him slightly, obviously confused.

“Well, no!” _It had better not be!_

“Oh,” said Clark, and he curled up around his pillow a little more.

“Why would you think it was obvious?” Lex demanded of him.

“Mom knew.”

“My ex-headmaster told your mother!” Lex informed him, feeling only marginally better about the situation.

Clark gave him an odd look.

“I’m pretty sure she only met him after the whole thing with showing up late in your Porsche,” Clark told him.

Lex frowned at him, because... “Wait, how long has she known about this?”

“About you?” Lex nodded. “Um, pretty much after the first time you met?”

Lex stared at him.

“You can’t be serious,” Lex said, aghast.

“Um…” Clark seemed to be searching for something nice to say. He ended up telling Lex, much to his dismay, “...Well, she wasn’t completely sure until maybe the second or third time you came over to the farm after school and ended up talking to her?”

Lex groaned and collapsed backwards on to the bed. He flung his arms up and over his head to cover his face, for good measure.

“I hate your family,” he informed Clark.

“No, you don’t,” Clark said, with way too much amusement in his voice.

“Fine,” Lex muttered through his arms. “I hate _my_ family. I hate my family, and our stupid Luthorian ways.” Ones that apparently included no functioning gaydar of any sort between them. Speaking of which… he moved his arms down to his chest and looked at Clark. “You _really_ don’t want to let my father know about this.”

“Why?” Clark asked, nothing but curious.

Lex grimaced. “Let’s just say that the conversation I had with him didn’t exactly go very well.”

To this, he garnered another shrug from Clark.

...Well, at least Clark seemed to be taking it all rather well?

“Had you even thought about it before the principal brought it up?” Lex asked of him. “Your sexuality, I mean?”

“Not really,” Clark said. “Is that bad?”

“Not really,” said Lex. “Most people wander around confused for years.”

“Uh, yeah Lex,” Clark told him. “It’s called being a teenager.”

Lex let out a short laugh.

“And maybe puberty?” Lex added for good measure, looking up at him.

Clark smiled.


	6. Day 6 -- Holding Hands

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Original thread-posting on Clexmas is here: [link](http://clexmas.livejournal.com/105796.html?thread=1154372#t1154372).

They were walking down the street, holding hands.

Solidarity. Yes. Solidarity in the face of heterosexuality-ness.

....Not that, uh, the rest of the town knew that, exactly. Which Lex was okay with. The rest of the town not knowing.

Lex was walking down the street -- well, technically the sidewalk -- holding hands with his brother -- well, technically his alien step-brother -- and Clark was holding his hand back.

It was… nice.

“Um, what are you guys doing?” Lana asked, as they walked up to the corner.

“We are being safe,” Lex told her, swinging their clasped hands together, back and forth, and feeling rather chipper about it. “Safety first!”

Clark rolled his eyes. “We’re heading for the bus stop. We’re going to the state fair,” Clark explained.

“That, too,” Lex added cheerfully.

“Uh, okay,” Lana said, eyeing the two of them.

“Geez,” said Chloe, “What are you guys, two?” She was in fine form; she had her full-snark on that day.

“C’mon guys--” Clark sighed.

“--Girls,” Lex corrected him.

“...girls,” Clark amended, after a pause.

The two girls glanced at each other.

“Is he _on_ something?” Chloe asked of Clark.

“Not exactly,” said Clark, glancing ruefully over at Lex, who was swinging their hands again.

“Not a meteor freak thing?” Lana asked more gently.

“No,” said Lex, tired of all the talking over his head that was going on at the moment.

“It’s fine,” Clark said with much patience. “He’s just a little excited right now.”

“4H,” said Lex. “Horses.” He was bouncing on his feet. “Clark’s _finally_ going to explain how they do all the judging on the cows.” He started grinning. “Lots and lots of ice cream in all sorts of different flavors.”

They moved off.

Lana and Chloe glanced at each other, then shrugged and walked off in the direction of the Talon.

They didn’t find out about the milkshakes until later.


	7. Day 7 -- Red (or Pink ^^)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Original thread-posting on Clexmas is here: [link](http://clexmas.livejournal.com/106220.html?thread=1173484#t1173484).

"You know, Clark, you never really did answer my question about whether you're bisexual or not," Lex noted, just before he downed a swallow of milk.

Clark glanced away from Lex's askance side-glance, and tried not to wince.

Lex casually leaned forward and set down his glass of milk onto (a coaster on) the coffee table, then took his time selecting a cookie from the plate in front of them. He leaned back into the couch again and was on his third (and last) bite of sugar-with-sprinkles when Clark broke.

"I don't know," Clark muttered, crossing his arms.

Lex eyed him sidelong, then faced forward. "That is allowed, you know." With no further forthcoming response from Clark, he added, "But, if you're not sure..."

"Here we go," Clark said under his breath.

"...then what, exactly, did you and Martha talk about, then?" Lex asked.

Clark blinked.

And then he began to blush a beautiful red.

"Um," he said.

Lex glanced over at Clark, and his forehead furrowed slightly in amusement.

"Well," Clark began, then stopped, dropped his gaze to his lap, and fidgeted in place.

Lex waited.

"...we sort of talked about the _possibility_ of my being bisexual instead of heterosexual or gay?" Clark offered.

Lex blinked at him.

"Your mother thought you might be _either_ heterosexual _or_ gay?" Lex said, trying not to sound as incredulous as he felt. At the way Clark shrugged at him and started turning red again, Lex wasn't certain how successful he might or might not have been. "How does that even work?" Lex could see thinking one or the other, _along with_ bisexual but _not_ the third; how could someone...

" _Before_ she heard from Reynolds about the possibility of your being bisexual?"

Clark nodded.

Lex ran a hand over his head. That just did not compute.

"Who did she think you were attracted to, Lana and... sorry, Lana _or_ ...Pete?" Lex put out there, because, seriously, what the hell?

Clark turned bright red again and shook his head repeatedly and quickly. "Not Pete! Pete is straight!"

"Clark, having a crush on someone is hardly precluded from whether there is any possibility of them liking you back," Lex told him, eyeing him askance again. He ought to know that from Lana.

"Still not Pete," Clark said almost desperately.

Lex waved it off casually, though he frowned internally at how overly-adamant Clark was being on the point. But he let the idea go; instead, he let himself sink further back into the couch cushions, thinking on the next most obvious point.

"...Why would Martha think you might _not_ actually be attracted to Lana?" Lex put out there finally, a bit stumped, because that wasn't obvious? ...without being _too_ obvious?

Clark shifted in place again. "Mom actually made me describe how I felt around Lana at one point," Clark said, looking more than a little embarrassed.

"...And?"

Clark listed off his symptoms of lovesickness.

And symptoms might actually be the right word for it, because... "Clark, that sounds like what you said you feel like around meteor rock." _Oh. ... **OH**._ "Did you still feel the same way after she stopped wearing the necklace?"

Clark squirmed in place again. "...Nnnnnnot _exactly_."

"Hm." Well, that explained Lana, but... "Who were you possibly-crushing on who was the guy, then?" Lex asked him, curious.

Clark turned even more brilliantly red again and started shaking his head.

"--Never mind," Lex said quickly. While his little alien step-brother was quite cute blushing like that, that was _far_ too many blushes for him in such a short time frame. Time for a slight subject change. "So, Martha's not quite given you 'the talk' yet, then?"

"Not for this..." Clark said, trailing off, and sounding like he'd dodged a Kryptonite bullet.

In a sense, he probably had. "She's not going to tell Lionel when -- neither of you? -- are too sure yet, is she?" Lex asked, for completeness.

Clark hunched in on himself a bit. "...No," he said, looking a little hunted.

Lex frowned slightly. Clark had never really exhibited any fear of Lionel before. Was he worried about what Lex had warned him about earlier? "Well, worst-case, you can sic Martha on him if he takes issue with things, correct?" he asked.

Clark winced.

Lex didn't really see what the problem was, since it seemed to have worked for Clark before.

"Well," Lex dithered slightly, trying to think of the best way to approach this. "Summer's coming up. You'll have plenty of time to figure it out then, won't you?"

"--No experimenting!" Clark said in a rush, grabbing Lex's shoulder.

Lex sighed. Trust Clark to jump to the wrong conclusion. He picked at Clark's fingers. "I only meant--"

" _ **I**_ meant no blowing things up this time; I got in _so_ much trouble last summer," Clark said, reaffixing his grip on Lex.

"Yes, I got that--" Lex began.

"Promise," Clark said seriously, shaking him lightly.

Lex rolled his eyes. " _Fine._ But I _meant_ \--"

"--I know what you meant," Clark sighed. "I'll figure it out on my own," Clark told him, then muttered, "...somehow..."

"Well, if you need help--" Lex began.

"--NO!" Clark said quickly, letting go of him. "No. I mean-- I-- I have to figure this one out on my own," he added firmly, before clenching his jaw and glancing away.

Lex frowned slightly, looking at him sideways as he turned away and slid back on the couch again. He looked kind of stressed.

Lex thought for a moment.

Then he pointed at the plate in front of them.

"Cookies," he said, and when Clark glanced over at him (...warily?), "And milk. Not exactly retrieved faster-than-humanly possible," that got a tentative smile from Clark, "but they're still good, and not getting any warmer. Or colder. Better eat up."

Clark smiled, and relaxed.

Good.

Lex selected another cookie. So did Clark.

They were good cookies and milk. And life was good.


End file.
